Radford Smelly

Mick and I compared views as we had our cuppas in bed this morning, his from the back bedroom in Scarborough, mine across the canal as boats started to move off.

As you all know Mick does very yummy cooked breakfasts, but this morning I made myself a pre-Mick breakfast, mushrooms on toast. Yes Mick cooks mushrooms, but not in a white sauce, he shys away from making bechamel sauce. Well he’d enjoyed his pizza last night, so I enjoyed my mushrooms, my excitement also meant my photo was out of focus!

My list of jobs to get done whilst there is that bit more space on board is really quite long, just where to start? I decided to see how my scissors coped with scalloping the edges of the panto leaves. Mum’s dress making sheers are good, but too big for cutting curves. Most other scissors I could find were nowhere near up for the job. The smallest pair, embroidery scissors were wonderfully sharp but too short and get stuck on my thumb. If I was doing maybe 100 leaves this would be fine, but for over 3000! The woman who has numerous pairs of scissors needs another pair.

At midday I checked in for a zoom meeting about #unit21 with the director. The current cost of materials has been a shock, nips and tucks a necessity. If only we had £5000 more we could build a false floor and have flexible neon in it, instead we are looking at some vinyl flooring with the neon lines painted. Some experimentation is needed but I’ll need some UV light to see what works. Looks like I’ll be experimenting whilst at Chippy.

It was far too hot outside after my meeting to head into town, I closed all the curtains and decided to get the remainder of the felt cut into triangles, a job I need all the dinette table for, so best to get it done now.

In Scarborough Mick managed to meet a builder, not the one intended, this chap reckons we need to replace guttering and tiles at the back of the house, not a surprise really. After ringing round numerous plumbers has also managed to get one booked, in November!

Over the last couple of days Tilly and I have been pestered by a couple of swans. They are beautiful creatures but lurk outside boat hatches expecting slices of white sliced to be thrown out for them. Their smoking habit of 40 woodbines a day very evident as they try to attract your attention! For those who knew Josie in Bempton, they sound just like her. We do our best not to encourage their demands.

I’ve also noticed three ducklings, a little bit older than toddlers. They swim back and forth with no sign of their mum. Orphans. I’ve chatted with them several times wondering if they are old enough to survive once the cold weather hits, have they learnt enough life skills to survive. Looking around the boat for something to give them porridge oats was the only item on the menu other than very frozen peas. I scattered a handful out of the hatch and they were very much appreciated. A few more sprinklings and I felt I was helping them to survive.

After cutting out another 1000 or so green triangles I spotted that the ducklings had returned, quietly sitting hoping for a few more Scottish Rolled oats. I put some in a bowl so that they were easier at hand and sprinkled a few more onto the surface of the water. They tend to sink after a few seconds so the ducklings had to be quick.

Looking up I suddenly realised that I now had two extra beaks demanding oats from me! The slight orange from nicotine staining on their white feathers and their long necks that I’d always been warned about as a child ‘They’ll break your arm!’ made me recoil inside the hatch.

Then the penny dropped. I’d been taken for a mug. The ducklings and swans were all in it together! Pulling at my heart strings, dishing out the porridge oats. Had I been conned? Or were the ducklings child labour!

0 locks, 0 miles, 0 step off the boat, 5 curtains drawn, 2 blinds, 12 midday meeting, 1 hot long Tilly, 9 hours very few taken, 2031 triangles, 5 blisters, 3 orphans, 2 Mafioso chain smoking swans, 27 C, 0 BBC1!