Sharp And Shiny. 4th April


P1240880smHow Rude! I’d kept their toes warm in bed (as usual) whilst they sat drinking tea, had a couple of crunches of my morning dingding and just settled down for my morning snooze when along she comes and puts me into my Escape Pod. I don’t normally need encouragement to go in, I really quite like it in there, just so long as the door is left open! This morning the door was zipped closed!!!

I remember this happening several time before and is normally followed by quite a stressful day. Last time I was popped in the front of a large box, next to her and Tom . It rumbled. The outside moved in front of us not to the side as it does on Oleanna and it moved a lot lot quicker! Today there was no big box for us all to sit in, I was just walked past lots of the noisy smelly boxes all moving the outside with us all in it. No matter what I said it just didn’t stop.

Last time when the outside stopped moving I had a new inside, a new boat, worth all the stress, very exciting! This time it didn’t look like that was going to be the case. If it was a new boat then I didn’t want it as it was steamy and full of stinky panting woofers!!! Tom took me back into the outside whilst the woofers disappeared. After a while we came inside again and went through a door. Here my Escape Pod was opened up so that I could meet a man and a lady. They were both quite nice, she cooed and he gave me strokes and a good feel all over. He tapped on the computer, said how good and sharp my teeth were (all the better for murdering with), how shiny my coat was (to catch the sunlight), how much of a skinny minny I am (it’s all that tree climbing I used to do before we came to this Stourport place!). All of this was very good. He then jabbed my neck with something sharp, I started to be concerned.

Tom mentioned about the tear I often have in my eye, the man had a look. He then did that funny thing of rolling my eye ball around and put a big blob of BRIGHT YELLOW stuff in it. I’d liked him before he did that! Then he looked at my bottom a few too many times. Eventually he let me go so I went to see what I could see out of the window away from him. But this was all frosty like our bathroom window and there wasn’t even a chink to breath fresh air through.

They all stood around and chatted, the man had a look up my nose and said something about maybe having had flu when I was little. My teary eye doesn’t bother me, it actually gets me lots of attention when I sit in the window. With a couple of packets of stuff we went back into the other room. Here they stood and chatted again for ages! What could be so important? I just wanted to get back home now.

The outside on the way back was different, the canal, a little less noisy.

Passport stamped for another 12 months shore leaveThroughout the day I started to feel a little bit ‘off colour’, she said. I agreed, when I looked through just my right eye I was very very yellow! The sofa and my bed beckoned where I stayed for much of the day. This evening it has been really hard to keep all four eyelids open, the inner ones just want to close. Maybe when they open again the world will be less yellow and I’ll have a new boat. Night night.

0 locks, 0 miles, 1 vets appointment, 3 stinky woofers, 1 stupid boy! 1 check up, 1 injection, 4 pills, 4 spot ons (to collect tomorrow), 1 yellow eye, 1 passport stamped, 12 more months of shore leave granted, 0 new boat, 1 new mooring needed now.